Till We Meet Again

Just like season, people change. People come and go. 

Some people come and go and are forgotten. But there are other people who share a part in our destinies. They come, they go, but they are never forgotten. They come, they go, but even after they go, they're still here. They never really went anywhere. 

With a multitude of people that we just temporarily meet, we might feel sad when they finally decide to move on without us.

Sometimes we feel blessed when Allah did not let us to waste our time with people are do not appreciate us in their life. 

So, let them go. We may still alive without them. We still have a lot of important things to do. We still have vision and mission to complete as a servant of Allah. 

However, if you found someone who may change your life, who gave beautiful colors in your life,  who appreciate you, who love you, who be with you through thick and thin and who accept you to be a part of their life, you really need to appreciate their existence in your life. 

It is really hard to meet with someone who will left the best memories and the sweet moment in our life. 

Last night, I received  a special gift from someone who I just know her in these two months. Even I just only know her in a short term but she got an attraction to make me comfortable to be friends with her. I may talk with her like we already known each other in a long period. Yesterday is her last day working in Venture as she will start her new semester soon. I'm gonna miss her. 

Marina, 

We may be going far away, just know that you will always be in the back of my mind, wrapped around in countless memories. There will not be a day where I won't catch myself daydreaming about the times we spent together. I am grateful that we have many ways to communicate, but I know it won't be the same as seeing you in person.Whether we are near or far, the times we shared will always be in my heart. Saying goodbye is hard, but I know it won't be forever. All the best for your new semester. Study smart and may you pass all your semester with flying colors. Take care and may Allah blessed your journey. 

Till we meet again. Insyaa Allah. 😊

Thank you for the lovely gift ❤

Sincerely, 

Qusyaimah Rosman

Pengalaman adalah Guru Terbaik

Jika saya ditanya tentang zaman yang paling saya rindui sepanjang kehidupan yang saya lalui, dengan yakin saya akan menjawab zaman kanak-kanak. Ya, zaman itulah zaman yang paling saya rindui. Seandainya saya diberi mesin masa untuk memutar kembali kehidupan saya, sudah semestinya saya akan kembali ke zaman itu. 

Ketika di universiti, saya dan rakan-rakan telah diberikan oleh pensyarah kami suatu tugasan untuk bercerita akan ujian hidup yang paling berat pernah kami tempuh. Pada ketika itu, tiada suatu perkara apa pun yang saya boleh ceritakan kerana saya rasakan sejak kecil hinggalah pada ketika itu, kehidupan saya berjalan dengan sangat lancar. Saya dapat tinggal di rumah yang selesa, saya boleh belajar dengan selesa, boleh ke sekolah seperti rakan-rakan yang lain, saya memperoleh keputusan peperiksaan yang baik, saya berjaya melangkah ke menara gading, saya punya rakan-rakan yang baik, saya ada kehidupan yang selesa kerana pada ketika itu pendapatan mama dan papa agak besar dan yang paling saya syukuri saya ada keluarga yang lengkap. Puas saya memerah otak untuk mencari idea untuk diceritakan pada ketika itu. Kosong. Terlalu banyak nikmat yang Allah bagi hingga tiada apa-apa kekurangan yang saya rasakan. 

Masa berlalu dengan sangat pantas seiring usia yang semakin bertambah. Alhamdulillah, usai menamatkan pengajian saya terus ditawarkan kerja yang bersesuaian dengan kelulusan saya. Pada ketika ini, kehidupan saya masih lagi lancar dan berjalan seperti biasa. Namun, langit tidak selalunya cerah. Pelangi juga tidak semestinya akan muncul selepas hujan. Pada ketika inilah Allah uji saya dengan pelbagai perkara sehingga menyebabkan saya tersungkur berkali-kali. Allah uji saya dengan ujian hati, ujian nafsu, ujian keluarga dan ujian kewangan. Semua ujian ini datang pada suatu waktu yang saya tidak pernah jangka. Saya tersungkur hingga saya rasakan saya tidak punya daya untuk bangkit kembali. 

Ujian yang paling hebat pernah saya lalui adalah ujian hati. Saya tersilap menyerahkan hati saya pada orang yang tidak tahu menghargai. Cinta saya dikhianati dan saya ditipu berkali-kali. Saya tidak pernah menyangka bahawa saya akan mengenali lelaki seperti itu. Dia sangat berani menipu identiti diri demi kepentingan peribadi dan nafsu sendiri. Walau sudah dua tahun berlalu, hati saya masih belum bisa melupakan dan memaafkan. Pembalasan Allah itu pasti ada. Jika tidak terjadi pada dirinya, Allah akan balas pada keturunannya. Bukan saya sombong untuk tidak memaafkan, tetapi kemaafan yang saya pernah beri dikhianati berkali-kali. Untuk apa lagi saya hulurkan kemaafan untuk manusia seperti itu? 

Tidak dapat saya bayangkan perasaan saya ketika satu-satu ujian itu menimpa diri saya. Saya yakin Allah uji saya ketika itu untuk melihat sejauh mana rasa pergantungan saya pada-Nya. Barang kali saya lalai dalam mengingatinya. Mungkin juga Dia tidak mahu saya terbuai dan hanyut dengan janji manis manusia. Saya rasa sangat sakit dengan ujian yang menimpa saya. Setiap malam saya menangis. Saya lemah. Saya runsing. Saya keseorangan melawan tekanan yang saya hadapi pada ketika itu. Saya hanya ada Allah tempat meluah rasa. Saya hanya ada Allah untuk melepaskan segala yang terbuku di hati. Tikar sejadah dan al-Quran menjadi saksi betapa siksanya dalam fasa untuk melepaskan diri dan bangkit kembali.

Hari demi hari, saya cuba muhasabah kembali diri mengapa saya diletakkan dalam situasi ini. Saya cuba renung kembali mengapa saya yang dipilih Ilahi. Walaupun ujian yang diberikan kepada saya terasa begitu berat, Allah tahu saya mampu untuk hadapinya. Allah tahu saya mampu mencari jalan terbaik untuk berhadapan dengan ujian yang Dia beri.

لا يكلف الله نفساً إلا وسعها 

Maksudnya: Bahawa Allah tidak membebani seseorang diluar kemampuannya
(Al-Baqarah: 286)

Potongan ayat suci ini sering bermain-main di minda dan hati. Allah tahu saya mampu. Allah tahu saya kuat. Saya selalu yakinkan hati sendiri bahawa Allah bukan memberikan ujian tetapi sebaliknya Allah berikan hadiah dengan cara yang istimewa. Allah lebih tahu apa yang terbaik untuk saya. Mana mungkin saya bisa bangkit dan berdiri semula jika bukan Allah pinjamkan kekuatan itu pada saya. 

Saya jarang meluah rasa pada manusia. Susah untuk kita bertemu dengan orang yang benar-benar ikhlas mendengar rintihan dan masalah kita. Dahulu, guru saya pernah berpesan, walau baik macam mana sekali pun seseorang dengan kita, biarlah aib dan keburukan kita hanya Allah yang tahu kerana suatu masa nanti orang yang pernah kita sayang, orang yang paling kita percaya itulah yang akan menjadi pengkhianat dalam kehidupan kita. Sandarkan segalanya pada Allah. Dia yang lebih mengerti. Dia yang paling memahami. Bahkan, ketika kita berbuat dosa Allah pelihara aib dan keburukan kita apatah lagi jika kita benar-benar bertaubat kepadanya. 

Saat saya menulis entri ini, saya baru sahaja menyelesaikan urusan mama saya. Mama kehilangan banyak darah kerana pendarahan yang teruk. Mama disahkan menghidapi fibroid. Saya melalui fasa kritikal di mana saya perlu menguruskan mama yang sakit dan juga perlu menyelesaikan tanggungjawab saya pada kerja-kerja yang tertangguh di pejabat. Alhamdulillah, entah dari mana Allah hadirkan kekuatan ini dalam diri saya. Semuanya milik Allah. Segala yang berlaku adalah kehendak-Nya. Saya mohon doa kalian yang membaca entri ini untuk mendoakan kesihatan mama saya. Barang kali ada dalam kalangan kalian yang mustajab doanya. Moga Allah limpahkan kebaikan buat kalian. Insyaa Allah. 

Sebelum saya mengakhiri entri ini, saya teringat akan kata-kata Buya Hamka dalam penulisannya. Siapalah saya untuk mengeluh dengan ujian yang Allah beri jika mahu dibandingkan dengan ujian yang dilalui oleh hamba-Nya yang terdahulu. Moga Allah kurniakan kita kekuatan untuk menempuhi ranjau dalam kehidupan ini. Insyaa- Allah. 

“Manakah yang besar penderitaan kita dengan penderitaan Nabi Adam? Yang di dalam surga bersenang-senang dengan istrinya, lalu disuruh ke luar. Dan manakah yang susah penderitaan kita dengan penderitaan Nabi Nuh, yang menyeru umat kepada Islam, padahal anaknya sendiri tidak mau mengikuti? Sehingga seketika disuruh Tuhan segala ahli kerabatnya naik perahu, anak itu tidak ikut. Malah ikut karam dengan orang banyak di dalam gulungan banjir. Di hadapan matanya! Dan kemudian datang pula vonis Tuhan bahwa anak itu bukan keluarganya.

Pernahkah kita lihat cobaan serupa yang ditanggung Ibrahim? Disuruh menyembelih anak untuk ujian, ke manakah dia lebih cinta, kepada Tuhannyakah atau kepada anaknya? 

Yakub dipisahkan dari Yusufnya.

Yusuf diperdayakan seorang perempuan.

Ayub ditimpa penyakit yang parah.

Daud dan Sulaiman kena bermacam-macam fitnah. Demikian juga Zakaria dan Yahya. Yang memberikan jiwa mereka untuk korban keyakinan. Isa al-Masih pun demikian pula. Muhammad lebih-lebih lagi.

Pernahkah mereka mengeluh? 

Tidak, karena mereka yakin bahwa kepercayaan kepada Tuhan menghendaki perjuangan dan keteguhan. Mereka tidak menuntut kemenangan lahir. Sebab mereka menang terus.

Mereka memikul beban seberat itu, menjadi Rasul Allah, memikul perintah Tuhan karena cintakan manusia. Oleh karena itu mereka tempuh kesusahan, pertama membuktikan cinta akan Tuhan, kedua menggembleng batin, ketiga karna rahim yang sayang dan segenap umat."

Hamba yang kerdil, 

Qusyaimah Rosman

We Belongs to Allah

She was pretty...

She spent half of her life plucking, waxing, moisturizing, dieting, exercising, brushing, applying make up, tucking this, hiding that, buying this and buying that.

Wore clothes that hung gracefully to her shape, accessories to add taste, fake eyelashes here, fake extension there, piercing this and even willing to do the plastic surgery.

"It is my body," she argued to those who criticized her.

Then, came the day when she died. She was shrouded with just a plain white cloth.

She was left to lay in the dirt where her body will disintegrate to nothing as the maggots feast on the skins she used to take so much care of.

"This is my body," she had argued.

It was never hers but was given by Allah. It belongs to Allah. Only Allah. For it was hers, she'd never have left it behind.

"Indeed we belong to Allah, and indeed to Him we will return." (Quran, 2:156)

Self reminder, 

Qusyaimah Rosman

Blessed of Allah

Bismillah.

Alhamdulillah, Allah has given me a lot of rezki. Just not in term of having someone in your life will make you happy but being yourself, love yourself and appreciate yourself is a greatest blessing from Allah. 

During my philosophy class a long time ago, my lecturer shared with me something that I'll never forget. She shared with me how all of us be blessed with different things. 

Some people are blessed with loving spouse,

Some people are blessed with children,

Some people are blessed with amazing careers,

Some people are blessed with health,

Some people are blessed with wealth,

We are all blessed with different things. 

Allah is very fair. He give us rezki based on our suitable situation. He never burden us with something that we can't afford to face it. I always remember what my lecturer said. It's true. What ever happen in my life, in our life, it is a greatest blessing from Allah. 

I'm already blessed with so many people that are in my life right now. My family, my friends. Why then I should waste my time to complaining about something that I don't have when I already have these amazing people in my life? 

So, if you're going through something difficult right now, or even if you've been waiting for something to happen, or maybe been waiting for someone for a while, waiting for a good career to come, and you don't know if it's coming anytime soon, why don't we flip the lens. We focus towards what we already have instead of focusing on what something still do not sure will belongs to us. Focusing on something that we don't have just make our heart full of question and we gonna be tired. The game is never gonna end. 

That's a lot to be grateful. Like what Allah says in the Quran, 

"If you're grateful, I will surely increase you more." (Ibrahim, 7)

When we grateful, our heart is at ease and at peace with what we already have. I really don't see any reason why I should be complaining. I truly have enough. I always believe this, in areas that we think we're lacking, we actually have more than enough and in areas where we think we are blessed, we actually have a lot more. 

Alhamdulillah. Thank you Allah for all the blessing. Thank you for all the rezki.  Thank you for enlightened me to Your path. I'm nothing without You. 

Your slave,

Qusyaimah Rosman

How to Feel Connection with Allah

Bismillah. 

As a human being, how we want to feel connection with our Creator? How do we feel the present of Allah? How we want to ensure that we are really confident that Allah is always with us? 

1) Make Du'a

Make du'a to Allah s.w.t talk to Him, call on Him, ask of Him. 

"And your Lord said, 'Call on Me, I will respond to you.'" (Ghafir, 40:60)

2) Be Grateful

Think of something that you are very grateful to Allah. 

"Be grateful to Allah. And whoever is grateful for (the benefit of) himself." (Luqman 31:12)

3) Pray Consistently

Prayer isn't for Allah but it's for us. He doesn't need it but we always need Him. 

"It is You we worship and You we ask for help." (Al-Fatihah, 1:5) 

4) Learn about Allah 

Try to understand Him. Obviously, the best book for this is the Holy Quran. Read and reflect! 

"Recite in the name of your Lord who created. Created man from a clinging substances." 

(Al-Alaq, 96:1-2)

5) Strive to Get His Love

Make Allah's love your ultimate goal. Who does Allah love? 

"And do good, indeed, Allah loves the doers of good." (Al-Baqarah, 2:195)

6) Fear Him 

Fear Allah before you commit a sin. Know that he is watching you everywhere. 

"But for he who has feared the position of his Lord are two gardens." (Ar-Rahman, 55:46)

7) Trust Him 

Trusting in Allah means that you trust and believe in His Mercy, His Help, His Wisdom, His Love, and His Goodness. 

"...do not despair of the mercy of Allah. Truly Allah forgive all wrong actions." (Az-Zumar, 39:53)

8) Remembering (Dhikr)

Remembering Allah (dhikr) has a great effect in because it has a special influence and it brings reward. 

"Verily, in the remembrance of Allah do hearts find rest." (Ar-Ra'd, 13:28)

Oh Allah, for Your mercy I hope, so do not abandon me to myself even for a moment. And correct all my affairs. There is no God but You. (Abu Dawood)

Dear friends, may the sharing of this may lead us and guide us to His path and Jannah. We are not perfect, but at least we can be better than before. We can change our life for better future. Insyaa Allah. :')

The Prophet Muhammad peace be upon him said: 

"The one who guides to something good has a reward similar to the one doing it." (Hadith Muslim)

Sinners, 

Qusyaimah Rosman

Everything Happen For A Reason

Remember that person you met on a train and they were so involved in a book with their earphones and nothing disturbed this?
This taught you to enjoy your own company.

Remember the person who convinced you that they love you, they made you believe in forever but then they left you in the middle of it?
This taught you to keep moving no matter how hard it is.

Remember this friend who talked to you everyday.
This friend you saw everyday and nothing seemed to drift you apart but then they replaced you?
This taught you that people come and go.

Remember that person who came in while you were too down and they were there for you?
This taught you that when you lose something, you have something else in return.

Remember that close person who was there everyday and then you just stopped talking?
This taught you that sometimes talking everyday doesn't mean you're the closest.

And afterall, no one is sent by accident to anyone.
Remember that too.

Be patient. Be strong. Be rational.

Love,

Qusyaimah Rosman

06 February 2019

Bismillah.

When birthday comes then we lose one year more from our age and we become one year more near to death.

Alhamdulillah for another moment, another year that Allah gave to me. May with the increasing of age will bringing us closer to Allah swt. Insyaa Allah.

Thank you mama and papa. I have been fortunate to have you as my parents. You know that you are the most special people in my life. Thanks for giving me everything you could, I love you very much.

Thanks for all the wishes and gift. May Allah bless all of you and guide you to the right path. Insyaa Allah.

Thank you ❤

Love,

Qusyaimah Rosman

Why Does Allah Bring People Into Your Life?

Bismillah.

There are moments when we leave them, and then go back to them as well, or they come back to us, but in the end, it was never meant to happen. It's getting too difficult for us to move on with something we couldn't imagine having. We so want to ask this question from Allah directly so that we get to know why does He send some people in our life, makes us live with them and then they leave us. We don't find any lesson except for the pain when they leave. 

Allah brings people into our lives for a purpose, and He then takes them away when their purpose is done. Every experience we have with people we meet is meant to teach us something. When He removes them from our life, we must say "Alhamdulillah" because there is most definitely a lesson we've learned that we can't comprehend at this moment. We'll never really know for sure what roles people play in our life, but if we look back, we'll realize that they have either sparked the cogs of change or have taught us something valuable. 

Allah places people in our lives with a specific times to suit a specific reason and removes them from our lives at specific times. Rather than thinking about why do the leave, think about "Why did the enter that will  make our life meaningful." The life of this world is transitory, it's a journey, and everyone we meet will leave us one day, and someone's leaving may drive us to think about the life - loss and gain. 

Life is all about losing and gaining. Not every friendship or relationship is meant to be what we have imagined. We always imagine a happy ending, but we forget that sad endings also exist. And maybe- just maybe, to teach us to value the people around us who don't want to leave us. 

People come and go. So, learned to appreciate who are still with us through thick and thin. May Allah give us the best friends and partner to lead us to Jannah. Insyaa Allah.

And remember, Allah always knows best. :')

Wallahu'alam.

Strong as always, 

Qusyaimah Rosman

Fresh Start of 2019

Bismillah.

Assalamu'alaikum wbt.

2018 has been such a great blessing to me. I can manage and explore well in my career, got a drastic increment offered,  meet someone that I started believe there is still a person who I can trust and gave me new spirit to being myself, have a great time with my family, siblings and friends. 

Besides, it shares an equal amount of hardships too when I really shock after my grandma tell me that my mom is suffered from fibroid. My mom keep this secret by herself without tell to anyone except my grandma. For those who read this, please pray for my mom. I'm also down when I got a black mail from someone who tried to make me down. Praise to Allah, He save me from the bad people and I will never forgive him for the rest of my life. 

Thanks to my family, friends, loved one and for those who still stay with me when I'm down. For all of that, I am grateful for everything, either it good or bad, happy or sad, Alhamdulillah for another moment, another year that Allah gave to me. 

May the coming year of 2019 be another blessing for us and bringing us closer to Allah swt. Insyaa Allah.

New me, 

Qusyaimah Rosman